Fear

Fearing the first step. Lately I have had a real problem with leaving my house. Looking outside and seeing people outside has made me want to stay inside. Everyone and there places to go and places to be. Me not having things that I have to do but mainly things that don’t have to get done by any sort of deadline. I have to do laundry and there is a laundry mat up the road, not to far from here and I am putting it off, simply because I don’t want any interaction. I don’t want people to see me. I don’t want to see anyone either. Now don’t get me wrong if there was no other existence of life out in the world I would be super depressed but this last couple of days, I just don’t want to step outside knowing that someone will see me. I know that is strange. A magic cloak would be super helpful right now. I just slip that on and I wont worry about being seen or people wanting to talk to me. I feel like a jerk when I say that but today its just how I feel. [sigh] I guess I should just go! Maybe its the fact that I actually have to do laundry and the laundry place that I see up the road looks a little sketchy. Maybe i’d be more enthusiastic about going to a different laundry mat? I don’t know. I am going to go. Right Now…